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Controlling and limiting anger is important in every aspect of one’s life. Without control you are putting limits on what you can accomplish. Anger can be an incredibly damaging force, costing people their jobs, and personal relationships. However, since everyone experiences anger, having a constructive approach to manage it effectively can turn it into a valuable asset. Our Anger Management workshop will give your participants that constructive approach. Participants will learn how to identify their anger triggers and what to do when they get angry. Through specific coping and planning techniques, anger can become a positive tool.

The Cycle of Anger

  • The Trigger Phase

The trigger phase happens when we perceive a threat or loss, and our body prepares to respond. In this phase, there is a subtle change from an individual’s normal/ adaptive state into his stressed state. 

  • The Escalation Phase

    In the escalation phase, there is the progressive appearance of the anger response. In this phase, our body prepares for a crisis after perceiving the trigger. This preparation is mostly physical, and is manifested through symptoms like rapid breathing, increased heart rate and raised blood pressure. 

  • The Crisis Phase

    As previously mentioned, the escalation phase is progressive, and it is in the crisis phase that the anger reaction reaches its peak. In the crisis phase our body is on full alert, prepared to take action in response to the trigger. 

  • The Recovery Phase

    The recovery phase happens when the anger has been spent, or at least controlled, and there is now a steady return to a person’s normal/ adaptive state.  In this stage, reasoning and awareness of one’s self returns. 

  • The Depression Phase

The depression phase marks a return to a person’s normal/ adaptive ways. Physically, this stage marks below normal vital signs, such as heart rate, so that the body can recover equilibrium. 

Unhelpful Ways of Dealing with Anger

1. DON’T ignore the anger.

2. DON’T keep the anger inside.

3. DON’T get aggressive. 

4. Passive- DON’T get passive-aggressive.

DON’T use non-constructive communication styles.

Constructive Disagreement

Helpful Ways of Dealing with Anger

  1. DO acknowledge that you are angry. 

  2. DO calm yourself before you say anything.

  3. DO speak up, when something is important to you. 

  4. DO explain how you’re feeling in a manner that shows ownership and responsibility for your anger. 

Elements of a constructive disagreement:

  • Solution-focus.The disagreement aims to find a workable compromise at the end of the discussion.

  • Mutual Respect.Even if the two parties do not agree with one another, courtesy is always a priority.

  • Win-Win Solution.  Constructive disagreement is not geared towards getting the one-up on the other person.  The premium is always on finding a solution that has benefits for both parties.         

  • Reasonable Concessions. In constructive disagreement, parties are open to making reasonable concessions for the negotiation to move forward.

  • Learning-Focus. Parties in constructive disagreement see conflicts as opportunities to get feedback on how well a system works, so that necessary changes can be made. They also see it as a challenge to be flexible and creative in coming up with solutions for everyone’s gain. 

Identifying the Problem

  • STEP ONE:  Get as much information as you can why the other party is upset. 

  • STEP TWO: Surface the other person’s position. Reframe this position into a problem statement.

  • STEP THREE:Review your own position. State your position in a problem statement as well. 

  • STEP FOUR:Having heard both positions, define the problem in a mutually acceptable way.

Negotiation Tips

  1. Note situational factors that can influence the negotiation process. Prepare!

  2. Communicate clearly and effectively.

  3. Focus on the process as well as the content.

  4. Keep an open-mind.

Triple A Approach

Alter:Alter means that you initiate change.

1.Change non-productive habits.

2.Respectfully ask others to change their behaviour and be willing to do the same.

3.Change the way you view a situation.

4.Change the way you react to a situation. 

Avoid:Avoid means steering clear of situations that can  
make you angry. 

1.Steer clear of people who make you upset. 

2.Steer clear of your ‘hot buttons.’

3.Remove yourself from a stressful situation immediately.

Accept:Find learning, Seek higher purpose or Vent to a

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